Me, Myself, and I Chapter 1

Me

Me

Why hello there America. I know why you’re here, and I gotto tell you I’m kind of flattered. But enough about me, let’s talk about me. The story of me is a long one, full of loss, pride, and the American dream. Mostly the dream part.

The story starts in a small town in southern Pennsylvania. Not an overly productive nor overly intelligent place, but it was home. It was there, propped against my fathers knee that I first learned the importance of my constitutional right to bear arms. Heh, heh, I remember it like it was yesterday. Just me, my seven brothers, my dad, and my dogs, buddy, and two-paw. We call him two-paw on account of him losing half of both front paws to dads bear trap phase. He was so sure he’d catch one…

Anyway, my brothers and I had just loaded up our Ak47’s and were getting ready to go at a couple of groundhogs that had made their way onto our lawn, when a state trooper swung by just down the end of the lot. Now I knew better than to fire while under the watch of a man of the law, but my younger brother Conrad, didn’t quite grasp the concept. He went and fired on that ground hog as if he had not a care in the world. While I couldn’t right take offense to this, seeing as I was about to do just that, the state trooper had. He came barrel assen up the drive and laid into my sweet brother like he had been the one under fire. Now my brother was only eleven, old enough to know how to shoot, but not old enough to understand the appropriate time to pull the trigger. I’ll tell you when that old copper came flying up to the house I was nervous to gun him down myself. My brother Cal was the one who pulled the trigger though. Three rounds right to law-man’s knee.

Well, as only natural, the state trooper was not very happy about that, and next thing we know our family is being hauled in front of a court and the prosecutors are having a go at Conrad and Cal, as well as my parents. Things were looking pretty down at this point in time. It was looking likely that Cal, who was at the time fifteen, was gonna end up in juvenile, and dad was likely to go to jail. It was at that time that I met the man who would change my entire life.

Continued in Chapter 2

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